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Matthew Crawley, Downton Abbey, Matthew and Mary

I know, I know… it’s been a painful week.

What is Mary going to do without Matthew? … {sniff} … What are WE  going to do without Matthew??

I’m offering you all a virtual valium and a box of tissues.

So today’s post comes in honor of Matthew’s life and the timeless love he and Mary shared.

What we can learn from Matthew Crawley’s life at Downton Abbey:

  1. Matthew modeled patience: Need we re-visit the drawn out cat-and-mouse game he and Mary played? After two years of near misses with Richard and Lavinia, Mary’s chilly exterior finally melted under the heat of Matthew’s love.  Thank goodness he was patient! (and, I suppose, thank goodness for the Spanish flu…)
  2. He went after his true love and treasured her: I have to admit, Mary can be a bit — er — beastly. Her smiles seem few, and though she extended grace to Tom on behalf of Sybil, she was ruthless to Edith’s ill-fated fiancé. Yet Matthew accepted her, flaws and all. Even a simple look shot across the parlor made his feelings obvious: he adored her.
  3. He honored his family without compromising personal standards: When Matthew got word that Lavinia’s father had included him in his will, he was uncomfortable. He knew the money could save Downton, yet was hesitant to accept on a matter of principle. Until the matter was resolved, Matthew was forced to walk a difficult line between pleasing Mary and saving the family … and staying true to himself.
  4. Matthew said what needed to be said — even when it was difficult:  How often did you cringe when Matthew tried to bring up Downton’s financial trouble with Robert? Lord Grantham didn’t want to hear the message of warning and concern, but Matthew knew the future depended on his business expertise — and his courage to speak it.
  5. He accepted Tom into the family when others didn’t, striking an unusual alliance between brothers. This partnership will prove vital to Downton moving forward, as Tom is now in a position to help the family become sustainable.
  6. He stuck up for Edith’s desire to write and become independent: I was so proud of Matthew for defending Edith’s journalism venture to Robert. In a family where Daddy seems to dictate so many decisions, Matthew’s positive influence opened a door for a woman with few options.
  7. Matthew soared despite puppeteered circumstances: “Cousin” Matthew was brought to Downton to become an heirYet he had no interest in high society or in a bristly woman who initially rejected him. Still, he was warm and kind to all, stealing the hearts of everyone in the family and becoming the son that Robert never had. In the end, Matthew died with fresh joy and the realization that nothing matters more than family.

Talk a walk down memory lane for my thoughts on “What Downton Abbey Teaches Us About Love,” HERE.

What else can we learn from Matthew? What will you most miss about him next season?